Red was here too

Tonight marked my last shift at the Delaware Gazette.

As my friend Jeremy and I left the office tonight, he asked if I left any messages from beyond for people. He asked if I etched "Red was here too" in any of the woodwork.

Truth be told, no. I'm not sure I've ever worked someplace where I've left less of a mark. Much of it was the brief five-month stint here. Part of it was the circumstances surrounding the place. Primarily it was the fact I gave up two months ago at making this place any better, as I didn't -- and don't -- honestly believe it wants to be any better than it is.

In some ways, the "Shawshank Redemption" reference my friend made seems ideal. It's almost like the end to a sentence for a crime I willingly committed.

A number of people asked if I'll miss the place. No. Not even remotely. It was the most miserable working experience I've ever had in my life. The 70-hour weeks wore me down. The ever-devolving focus on good journalism depressed me. I've never questioned if I wanted to stay in journalism as much as I have here. And I really won't miss how cold my office was when I came in at 6 a.m. and a wind current developed between the two windows there.

Will I miss the people? Sure, some of them, but I can socialize with them still. But overall, I'm much happier knowing I don't work there anymore.

Red might've been there, but no one will remember him. It's probably better that way.